it's been three weeks now...seems like a lifetime. days continue to be long. but i do have some moments of love and grace that make the days more livable.
* two hikes this weekend, surrounding myself with the fall beauty. God's creation does heal...
* friends and family who spent their saturday to clean, organize, and landscape. i felt their love through their hands.
* a delightful brand new pink vacuum cleaner that found it's way to my doorway...i think i may just smile while i'm cleaning.
* joining the ymca...these days have been focused on physically staying well. i'm thankful for the gift offered to me to get out the house and stay healthy.
* dinner with friends...
* the overwhelming support and presence of my family. i spend my thursdays with kelly (my amazing sis-in-law) and her kids. mike's parents are so supportive and caring. my mom's daily phone calls. my dad's help with records, paperwork, life stuff. my sister taking care of so many details. adam's phone calls. hugs from my nephews. it all helps in the midst of chaos.
* my dear friends curt and kristin...no words can express the gratitude and love i have for these two people. their friendship is a sure foundation for me to stand on these days...
but i won't lie that things continue to be hard, especially the mornings and nights. i wake up in the morning, after a restful sleep only to be reminded of the reality i find myself. nights are when i miss mike's presence the most. when my mind wanders and is flooded with questions, memories, aches. i am still in a numb state and know that days are still ahead where the grief will perhaps surge out.
* two hikes this weekend, surrounding myself with the fall beauty. God's creation does heal...
* friends and family who spent their saturday to clean, organize, and landscape. i felt their love through their hands.
* a delightful brand new pink vacuum cleaner that found it's way to my doorway...i think i may just smile while i'm cleaning.
* joining the ymca...these days have been focused on physically staying well. i'm thankful for the gift offered to me to get out the house and stay healthy.
* dinner with friends...
* the overwhelming support and presence of my family. i spend my thursdays with kelly (my amazing sis-in-law) and her kids. mike's parents are so supportive and caring. my mom's daily phone calls. my dad's help with records, paperwork, life stuff. my sister taking care of so many details. adam's phone calls. hugs from my nephews. it all helps in the midst of chaos.
* my dear friends curt and kristin...no words can express the gratitude and love i have for these two people. their friendship is a sure foundation for me to stand on these days...
but i won't lie that things continue to be hard, especially the mornings and nights. i wake up in the morning, after a restful sleep only to be reminded of the reality i find myself. nights are when i miss mike's presence the most. when my mind wanders and is flooded with questions, memories, aches. i am still in a numb state and know that days are still ahead where the grief will perhaps surge out.
6 comments:
Kelly,
I'm so grateful that you're posting and sharing. I'm thinking and praying about you all the time, and it's so kind of you to check in and let us all know how you're doing. I cannot even begin to imagine what you're going through, and my heart aches for your loss. I wish we were closer so that we could take you to dinner and go on walks, but I'm grateful for the support system you have there. Love and prayers, dear friend.
Oh, dear one.... you are such an amazing woman.... that you can still recognize the blessings in the midst of this time.... amazing, amazing....
Glad that the vacuum made it to your doorstep already.... you are loved, dearie. I'll be praying for you today, even as I vacuum, too....
My name is Jennie Brady and i am Amy Wiebe's sister. She told me about the loss of your husband and i have been grieving for you ever since. your candor and grace, even in this blog, are a testament loud and clear of your faith and belief in an awesome God. it is obvious that He is cradling you in His arms this very moment. i do not know you, but i love you and i will continue to lift you and your family up in prayer.
I am at a loss for words, Kelly. I am so glad you have people surrounding you with love and friendship. I think of you every day, multiple times. Each time I remember you, I pray for you. Sleep well tonight.
Kelly, you are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. I think of you so often and send prayers up on your behalf that you will have moments of happiness and joy... maybe more than moments. May God sustain you in a way only He can. Ann (Snow) Schmidt
kelly...i love to read your "story". It is a story that i wish you didn't have to write but am so grateful that you do. you are an awesome writer and express your words beautifully. you are an amazing woman, full of grace and gentleness. mikie is smiling from heaven. Thank you for sharing your heart for all to see. i love you... mom p
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